By: Diala Ziadeh
“One large, thick crust, with extra
cheese pepperoni Pizza and potato wedges to go,” says the lady behind the
counter as she repeats my order at Pizza Hut, whilst I enjoy the hateful looks
women by the salad bar are showering me with.
According to a study conducted by
CNN, close to 6 out of 10 women are battling their weight, which would explain
the detestable looks I receive from women on a daily basis. Though 60 percent
of women are struggling with obesity and health risks due to the extra weight,
an estimated 2 percent of the world’s women population is also at risk for
being underweight.
“There are a lot of shows about
losing weight, but they really don't have anything for people who are
underweight," says Amanda, an interviewee from a CNN article regarding
weight gaining. "It's just as frustrating for people who are trying to
gain weight.”
I happen to be one of the very few
unlucky people dealing with being underweight. Unfortunately, I have an
extremely fast metabolism, which is defined as the amount of calories the body
needs while resting; meaning that I lose weight more than I ingest.
My struggle began at a very early
age, when I was only 3 years old my mother started realizing that my body loses
weight faster than it gains it; regardless of the endless methods my mother
tried, from appetite openers to fattening diets, nothing seemed to make me gain
the weight.
Until the year 2013, I was referred
to as Olive, the cartoon character Popeye’s wife, she is a stick. That year I
decided to gain weight and look healthy, I figured that eating a lot was not
helping me reach my goal and that doctors only cared about me being healthy
than having the body I deserved.
Every year during my annual
checkup, the doctor would show me my charts and how healthy my body is, how I
am as healthy as it gets; and comforts me over the fact that I look like a
starved human being. According to the various doctors from most of my annual
checkups, my body burns 1830 calories per day while at rest, so you can only
begin to imagine how much it actually burns given that I am an active human
being, who happens to do more than just sit in bed all day. Although doctors
have declared me to be healthy, some did voice their concerns regarding being
underweight; “how about a shot of rice with lemon chicken” said Ali Al Serafi,
jokingly, regarding my weight.
Being underweight puts me at high
risk of constant headaches and dizziness, most times leading to migraines. It
affects my liver, kidneys, and last but not least is one of the main reasons
for constant fatigue. In fact, I suffer from migraines twice a month at the
least, I have had liver problems and was forced to live on a strict soy diet
for six months, not to mention have had kidney stones at a very young age.
Other than the various health
risks, being underweight is not as glamorous as portrayed everywhere. For
instance, shopping for clothes is extremely difficult given that most stores
either do not sell the skinniest sizes or get limited pieces of them;
seriously, most of my clothes have to get tailored after being bought, that is
if not bought at a kid’s store. Another embarrassing point, is not being able
to flaunt your body because you simply do not have one. Being underweight comes
with the unfortunate advantage of being flat, as flat as a ruler; no man wants
flat.
July 2013, I took it upon myself to
gain 5 kilos, to become 50 kilograms; I am 163 inches long should at least be
55 kilos; but hitting 50 for me was a dream far from ever happening. I joined a
gym, followed famous gymnast bloggers, and bought protein shakes with weight
gainers and high calories, as high as 1830 calories per scoop; I was having 3
scoops per day.
My journey to gaining the weight
began. The first three months I would gym 5 days a week, eat as much as 7 meals
a day in addition to the protein shakes. I would lift weights that were half as
much as I weighed. Though it was exciting and fun, I will not deny the pain I
felt every time I stepped onto the scale and saw my weight remain constant.
I began to educate myself further
about weight lifting, hoping to find the glitch that would make me gain the
weight. Most exercises out there are used to losing the weight, aimed at making
people slimmer; turns out the only way for me to gain the weight is to work twice
as hard at the gym, and eat four times as much as the normal person. Five
months into working out, lifting extremely heavy, and eating everything I could
get my hands on; I finally gained my first two kilograms.
Ladies, the feeling you get when
you hop onto the scale and find yourself two kilos less, was the feeling I
experienced gaining it…
By July 2014, I hit my goal; I was
at last 50 kilos of hard work and stuffed food. Though some of you might mock
the fact that I am complaining about having to stuff my face with fattening
yummy food; trust me when I tell you the eating experience is not as pleasant
when you are forcing your stomach to hold more than it can; when you try and
stop yourself from vomiting, and especially not enjoyable when you have to endure
the stomach aches caused by the protein shakes and excessive eating.
It is now February 2015, I am 22
years old, 163 inches, and I weigh 53. I now can proudly flaunt my body knowing
that not only do I feel healthy but I look it too; not to mention I actually
have the body I deserve now. Also, just the other day I broke my record, I
deadlifted 70 kilograms; more than some of the men at my gym. I am well aware
of the fact that I can never stop going to the gym or else I will lose the
weight; but now I can eat normally because my body is used to taking in just
the amount it needs to burn. My metabolism rate hasn’t gone down at all, in
fact it has become a little faster due to working out but at least tamed and
controlled.
My new and final goal is 57 kilos. And
even after I gain the weight, I intend on maintaining it and keeping my body in
shape.
Do not hate me for trying to gain the weight people, you do not see me
hating you for trying to lose it. I
understand the struggles of a woman trying to lose weight, and after this
article I am hoping that my struggles to gain the weight are as equally
understood rather than looked down on. Being skinny and underweight should
never be a woman’s goal, instead being healthy and having the body deserved is
what every woman out there should aim towards. At least that is what my
experiences have taught me.